Weekly Parshat Portion
Amaizing Insides on the Weekly Parshat given by the best Rabanim and Speakers in the Torah World.
Act From the Heart
ושסע אותו בכנפיו לא יבדיל והקטיר אותו הכהן המזבחה על העצים אשר על האש עולה הוא אשה ריח ניחוח לה'.
And he shall rend it by its wings, but without completely dividing it in two; and the priest shall burn it on the altar, on the wood than is on the fire; it is a burnt sacrifice, an offering, made by fire, of a sweet savor to Go-d. (VSYIKRA 1:17)
When Rabbi Yechiel Mordechai Gordon, the rosh yeshiva of Lomzw Teshiva, was in America, he used to learn with a thirteen years old boy and teach him two or three words of Rashi every day. The Rabbi would say to the boy, “Nu, my dear one, do you now understand the word? Say it again and again”.
This scene would repeat itself every evening. The Rabbi, with great patience, would explain the words the boy had difficulty comprehending. The Rabbi’s face would shine with contentment, and you could see the happiness sparkling in his eyes when the boy finally was able to repeat the few words of Rashi correctly.
The boy had not had any Jewish education previously, except from learning to read the siddur. His parents had only provided for a bar mitzvah and had not felt it necessary to give any further Jewish education. But after the bar mitzvah, the boy had suddenly felt a strong thirst to learn Torah. After coming home from public school, he would run to the local beis midrash with his chumash in hand, and would ask everyone he could find there to explain a few words in the chumash. Afterwards he would repeat these words to himself. Gradually, he learned many parashios, and later, with this method, he began learning Rashi.
The boy was fortunate one day to find Rabbi Gordon in the beis midrash. He, upon seeing the Rabbi sitting and learning, gathered up enough courage to ask him for help in his learning. The Rabbi did not know him, but was greatly impressed by his sincerity and tremendous efforts to understand the Torah. He took pity on the boy, and with great patience would learn with him every evening. As a result of Rabbi Gordon’s help, the boy progressed a great deal in Torah until he became a devout student of Rabbi Gordon, and eventually he even received semichah (ordination) from him.
Rabbi Gordon understood that success in Torah does not depend on a person’s talents but rather on his love for and commitment to Torah learning. Similarly, success in marriage is largely determined by one’s sincerity of heart.
A poor man’s offering is especially beautiful because he makes the difficult choice to bring it despite his meager income. G-d does not need any offering to be brought to the Altar, but He does desire a person’s devotion, and an offering is the means by which a person shows this commitment to G-d. the verse says, “At this I will look, at a poor man and a broken spirit.” The willing heart of a poor man is clearly demonstrated when he gives far beyond his means. Similarly, Rabbi Gordon, in the above story, saw the pure heart of the boy, and therefore was willing to devote so much of his time to him. So, even though the bird’s wings have an unpleasant odor, nevertheless, a dove is still a beauty for the Altar, since it allows a poor man to express his love for G-d.
Everybody Wins in Marriage
Being accepted by your spouse in marriage is similar to G-d accepting a sacrifice. Just as G-d is not looking for wealth, and even a thousand burnt offerings are worthless in His eyes if they are not given with a pure and willing heart, so too does your spouse only value what you do with sincerity and not simply a price tag. You can bring her diamonds, perfumes, and expensive lowers, but if your heart is not in the giving, they will have no meaning at all. On the other hand, if you bring your spouse the smallest and simplest gift, but you act with all your act and love, she will value it as if you brought her the most precious diamonds in the world.
You cannot conceal from your spouse what is going on in your heart. You may be the greatest actor, but you cannot fool your spouse. So, therefore, the only way to improve your marriage is to work on your heart so that it is full of sincere and genuine love.
Although we may not realize it, our hearts are controlled by our actions. The more we practice being kind and loving toward our spouses, the more our hearts actually become kind and loving. Only actions which generate feelings of love can permanently influence the heart, because emotion alone can be easily fade or disappear.
The poor man mentioned before was a master of giving. He had almost nothing and yet he gave so much. That is how we must learn to treat our spouses. No matter how little we have, we should constantly give of ourselves.
Marriage is an ongoing spiritual test, but not a contest of wills. Instead of having a winner and a loser, when both partners give, everyone wins.
Adapted from “Beloved Companions” by Rabbi Yisroel Peasach Feinhandler page 294
Post created: Mar 22, 2009 | Updated
ויביאו את המשכן אל משה את האהל ואת כל כליו קרסיו קרשיו בריחו ועמודיו ואדניו.
And they brought the mishkan to Moshe, the Tent, and all its furniture, its clasps, its boards, its bars, its pillars, and its sockets. (Shemos 39:33)
One of the great people who lived in Jerusalem was Rabbi Shlomo Zalman Baharan Levi. He was constantly doing chesed with people.
Once, his neighbor gave birth to a baby boy but was unable to nurse her child because of an illness that she had. She also did not have money to pay for another woman to nurse the child. Several days went by, and Rabbi Levy heard through his neighbor’s walls the constant crying of the hungry baby.
At that time, Rabbi Levy’s wife was nursing their own baby. He said to his wife, “Listen to me, my dear. G-d does not send a malady, before he sends the cure. Now that you are nursing, we can help our neighbor and her son. I will take your place and do all the chores that have to be done at home. You will eat more and rest a lot, so that you will have enough milk to feed our own child and also our neighbor’s child.” His wife, who was as eager as her husband to do chesed, readily agreed to her husband’s proposal. Whenever she heard her neighbor’s child crying, she would go next door and nurse him. This worked well during the day and the evenings, but at night the neighbor was too embarrassed to come in and disturb the rabbi and his wife. To solve that problem, Rabbi Levy changed his sleeping habits, and retired early every day. He would wake up and begin his Torah learning at the time when everyone else was jest retiring. In this way, since he was awake, he could easily hear the neighbor’s baby crying, and he will then awaken his sleeping wife.
Rabbi Levy understood the importance of doing chesed and spared no effort to complete these tasks. Marriage is based on performing chesed for one another and we must do our utmost to succeed in this area.
The king does not call his daughter “my wife” since the love that the person has for his wife is in a different sphere than the love he has for his blood relatives. The love between husband and wife is more than simple love; it is the merging of two human beings into one, as the verse says: “and they should become one flesh”.
When a person realizes that his spouse is an integral part of himself, then there can be no room for impatience, anger, or frustration toward one’s partner. A person does not become infuriated at himself when he makes a mistake, justification for anger when he or she errs. The verse in the Torah is hinting to us that it is not enough to live with our spouses side by side, but rather we must try to blend into one another emotionally and spiritually. Try thinking of your spouse as a part of yourself, instead of someone else.
The idea of being one is that both husband and wife have spiritual tasks that they need each other to complete and cannot be alone. Therefore, they are really one, since whatever is lacking in one can be found in the other, and together they make one spiritual whole.
To reach this level of love one must constantly be giving to the relationship. Always think of ways to make your spouse happy and to be thoughtful and kind to your spouse. A shining example of giving is seen in the story of Rabbi Levi and his wife. They worked together as two parts of a whole to do an outstanding chesed. When being one with your spouse becomes your constant concern, you will begin to realize that there is no one in the world like your spouse. The love you feel for your spouse should be as strong as the love you feel for yourself. This should form a model for our relationships with every other Jew as well, as it is written in the Torah “And you shall love your friend as you love yourself”. But we must begin by feeling that love toward our souses, and from there we can gradually build on that precedent until we learn to love everyone else.
Marriage is just like a spring. The more you give it, the more it gives back. In marriage too, the more you care for your spouse, the more you will receive.
And they brought the mishkan to Moshe, the Tent, and all its furniture, its clasps, its boards, its bars, its pillars, and its sockets. (Shemos 39:33)
One of the great people who lived in Jerusalem was Rabbi Shlomo Zalman Baharan Levi. He was constantly doing chesed with people.
Once, his neighbor gave birth to a baby boy but was unable to nurse her child because of an illness that she had. She also did not have money to pay for another woman to nurse the child. Several days went by, and Rabbi Levy heard through his neighbor’s walls the constant crying of the hungry baby.
At that time, Rabbi Levy’s wife was nursing their own baby. He said to his wife, “Listen to me, my dear. G-d does not send a malady, before he sends the cure. Now that you are nursing, we can help our neighbor and her son. I will take your place and do all the chores that have to be done at home. You will eat more and rest a lot, so that you will have enough milk to feed our own child and also our neighbor’s child.” His wife, who was as eager as her husband to do chesed, readily agreed to her husband’s proposal. Whenever she heard her neighbor’s child crying, she would go next door and nurse him. This worked well during the day and the evenings, but at night the neighbor was too embarrassed to come in and disturb the rabbi and his wife. To solve that problem, Rabbi Levy changed his sleeping habits, and retired early every day. He would wake up and begin his Torah learning at the time when everyone else was jest retiring. In this way, since he was awake, he could easily hear the neighbor’s baby crying, and he will then awaken his sleeping wife.
Rabbi Levy understood the importance of doing chesed and spared no effort to complete these tasks. Marriage is based on performing chesed for one another and we must do our utmost to succeed in this area.
Husband and Wife: Two Parts of One Whole
The king does not call his daughter “my wife” since the love that the person has for his wife is in a different sphere than the love he has for his blood relatives. The love between husband and wife is more than simple love; it is the merging of two human beings into one, as the verse says: “and they should become one flesh”.
When a person realizes that his spouse is an integral part of himself, then there can be no room for impatience, anger, or frustration toward one’s partner. A person does not become infuriated at himself when he makes a mistake, justification for anger when he or she errs. The verse in the Torah is hinting to us that it is not enough to live with our spouses side by side, but rather we must try to blend into one another emotionally and spiritually. Try thinking of your spouse as a part of yourself, instead of someone else.
The idea of being one is that both husband and wife have spiritual tasks that they need each other to complete and cannot be alone. Therefore, they are really one, since whatever is lacking in one can be found in the other, and together they make one spiritual whole.
To reach this level of love one must constantly be giving to the relationship. Always think of ways to make your spouse happy and to be thoughtful and kind to your spouse. A shining example of giving is seen in the story of Rabbi Levi and his wife. They worked together as two parts of a whole to do an outstanding chesed. When being one with your spouse becomes your constant concern, you will begin to realize that there is no one in the world like your spouse. The love you feel for your spouse should be as strong as the love you feel for yourself. This should form a model for our relationships with every other Jew as well, as it is written in the Torah “And you shall love your friend as you love yourself”. But we must begin by feeling that love toward our souses, and from there we can gradually build on that precedent until we learn to love everyone else.
Marriage is just like a spring. The more you give it, the more it gives back. In marriage too, the more you care for your spouse, the more you will receive.
Post created: Mar 02, 2009 | Updated
